On/off switch

There are times where I wish I could just power down.

I get jealous of Noah. I watch him sleep and wonder how he does it. I took sleeping pills last night and still only managed to get a whopping 3 hours of sleep. And here I am again, 4 am, knowing I have to be at work in 5 hours, and my body and my brain will not let go. I feel like they think they are going to miss something if they power down.
Like somehow, by letting me sleep, there will be some amazing party or SOMETHING and they will not get invited and it will be all my fault because I made them go to bed. Clearly, I have got to get some control over this situation. I have better control over Eli’s sleeping habits than my own.
I guess I should try to power down as Noah is now snoring beside me and work is getting nearer and nearer. I wish I could teach my body that the better party is in my dreams than in my waking life. Maybe I just have such an amazing life my body does not want to miss a second of it….
Hey, at least I am an optimistic insomniac.


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