I don’t like thinking about my dad. Much like I don’t like thinking about my ex-husband. I know they were a part of my life and there is nothing I can do about it now, but I just choose to think about happier things. But every now and then something happens that makes me remember them. Something that brings that relationship into the light. For me, that use to be Fathers Day. Now, Fathers Day has become something else.
I always new that Noah was a great man. I mean, when I first met him, he was a great young man, and a great friend. I watched him become the great man that I fell in love with. In a way we grew up together. It’s hard to think of your college years that way, but they are. You still have a lot of growing to do. At least I did, and I was older than most college kids. Regardless, Noah has always been there. When we got married I knew he was going to be an amazing life partner. Whatever we were going to go through, we were going to do it together. But we both knew that parenthood was more than likely not on the table.
Not from a lack of want mind you, but just because my body was not going to allow me to. Or at least that’s what we thought. Clearly, Eli missed that memo because here he is, healthy and somehow it has not left me totally wrecked so I think we won. We being my little family. But I think Eli and I won the most. (If that’s a thing)
You see, I knew Noah was a great person. I knew he was a great partner for me. But what I did not know was how much he was capable of loving something that was us. It is hard to step out of your relationship and see how much someone cares for it. But your child is something that stemmed from your relationship. It is a part of it. And when I watch him love and care for Eli, I see how much he cares for me, for us, for our life together. Noah is a wonderful husband and a caring partner, but he is the most loving father I have ever seen. When people ask me how Noah has handled fatherhood and I am always speechless. He is new at this, and like anyone who is new there is a lot to learn but there is also so much joy in seeing development. He gets so excited by the smallest things Eli does sometimes it makes my heart smile so big I feel it in my chest.
Noah has redefined Fathers Day for me. It is a day for him and Eli. For him to cherish the day Eli made him a dad. For Eli to relish in fact that his father loves him more than he will ever be able to express. For me, it is a chance to watch my family bond.
Happy Fathers Day Noah. Thank you.