I am a time optimist.
This sounds like it’s a good thing and sometimes it is. I always think that I can get more accomplished in the time I have than I actually can. “10 min until we have to leave for the party? Let me throw a dip together.” “20 min until 100 people are going to be at my house? Let me hop a quick shower.” I never seem to understand why people are always talking about “not enough hours in the day”. In my mind I just think they are not using them right. Or they are choosing to spend them a way that is not always to their liking and that is their own personal problem.
Seeing that written, I am very judgmental with my assumptions of other peoples time. WOW!
Because I am just now starting to realize that sometimes it cannot ALL get done. That sometimes you have to let things go. I have already had this issue with learning to delegate tasks to other people. In an effort to never make anyone ever feel inferior, I would always assume every responsibility with the result that people were standing around waiting to be given a specific task and I just decided I would do them all. (I was never really able to do them all!) So now I have gotten better about delegating but sometimes there is no one to delegate things to so we end up with…
Me. Struggling with my time optimism. Clinging to projects like Rose clung to Jack in Titanic. Refusing to recognize that I am just holding on to a really cold dead guy in the middle of the ocean and that at some point I am going to have to let go before it gets even harder to let go. And is it just me or was there really NO ONE ELSE around that could have helped them out? Did he really have to die? I mean for my metaphor and the movie he did but really? REALLY?
All this to say I am afraid there are some projects that I am going to have to let go of. Some things that are simply not going to be able to be exactly like I want them to be. As hard as this is for me, I am trying to tell myself that what I have is still wonderful, because it is. I am proud of my time.