Well the think pink life is over. Part of me is glad. This means I am done with the craziness that was me being sick. But I do miss the loving people who surrounded me and lifted me when I could have hit rock bottom. I met some amazing people doing Legally Blonde. Although the show was not some great work of art (It is REALLY hard to accomplish that with a musical movie), the people helped me remember that #gethappy is just as important. They may not know it, but they helped me find a part of my life that I had forgotten about. They helped me remember that I do have value and that I do matter. . Lord knows the production had it’s issues. But I NEVER felt belittled. Which was quite the opposite from what I had experienced recently.
All of that being said, I now feel I currently have 3 “projects” in the works, and I couldn’t be happier!
WE OPEN ON THURSDAY! Who’s ready to get there Blonde on?!? #thinkpinkLegally Blonde The Musical presented by The Gallery Players, Inc
We open TOMORROW! Today’s #thinkpink comes from our friends at the Stoney Creek Pet Lodge! They are sending a shout out to our four legged cast members! *SNAPS*
It is days like today I am so grateful for everyone that took the time to #thinkpink or just support me at all. Today was full of reminders of how limited I am sometimes. For the most part I am strong, confident, positive, and I just all out refuse to believe that this condition effects me. On a good day I forget that it does. However, I have been handed a swift kick in the ass recently and as much as I keep trying to act like it’s not there, it is. Days like today make it hard to forget. I just have to remember the good and forget the bad. Like all rough things, this too shall pass.
(Yes the shirt is pink! LOL)
Part of me is very concerned that all these post to Facebook maybe sharing too much. The support is wonderful but I may…I may have said things that make it seem like all I am doing searching for support. And I am in a way. But I am also doing this to support the production and explain why I am still connected to this bag that I SHOULD have been rid of a week ago.
#thinkpink was original for the production. So maybe I can turn it back around. Help people remember, help me remember, what this started of as!
Most Recent- As many of you know I have been receiving an antibiotic for a sever infection that doctors found in my blood. I was told originally that I would be done on the 14th which would put me in RIGHT AT the buzzer for opening night of Legally Blonde The Musical presented by The Gallery Players, Inc., but I would still get to go on stage needle free! When I went to the doctor last Tuesday they told me that they were extending the dose of the medication through to the 20th. My heart broke for many reasons as I am sure you can imagine. It is hard to see the silver lining in the postponement of our opening, but I will now go on stage needle free. What no one knows is that #thinkpink has not just been a count down until our opening, but it has helped me count down the days until I will be done with this medication and my life will become normal again.
I invite everyone to #thinkpink with me this week! Even if you don’t wear something pink then find something pink, make something pink, drink something pink, do SOMETHING and support the show and help me count down. 4 days to go!
Middle- Today was an arts and craft day around the house today. My sons girlfriend even came over to play! (Sorry Stone Notchey) Guess what we were “arts and craft”ing. 😉 #thinkpink
Oldest- Tonight’s pink is brought to you by the lovely Laura Moog Lanier! As the storm heads our way (maybe) I get to snuggle in my bunny PJ’s! #thinkpink
It gets better – I promise!
Last post I told you about all the crappy Doctor stuff. Well it just got crappier. YAY! Besides the fact that we are now under a flash flood warning til Monday (which is better than the hurricane that we thought was going to hit us), the city I live in has shut down the theatre I work in so no opening night for our production of Legally Blonde. Our production will now open on the 20th. None of this holds a candle to the fact that I was told on Tuesday that the antibiotics that I thought I would be done with today, 9/14, I now have continue until the 20th.
All of that being said, I had started doing a count down to the shows opening by wearing pink every day to support and publicize the opening of our show. It was something fun and a great way to something exciting. When the production was postponed I thought about stopping and picking back up once we were closer to the date but now it’s become something more to me. #thinkpink has become a count down to the finish line of my antibiotic. I will not have to carry around this stupid bag. I wont have needles in my chest. My son will hug me with out being afraid he is going to hurt me. The side effects will go away. My life will return to my version of normal.
So I have decided to post my #thinkpink Facebook post here too. Not just to gain support for a fun show filled with loving and supportive people but to continue to find a way to dance in the rain. I just have to remember, I have lived through rougher storms and I WILL get through this.
9/10- You better believe Legally Blonde is opening this Friday because “nobody (or weather) screws somebody who’s Legally Blonde”! So in honor of our show opening this week, I will be wearing pink every day!
9/11- What’s wonderful way to start day 2 of pink week? Having brunch with Jordan Beswick at The Iron Hen! #thinkpink
9/12- I know it’s late but sadly Legally Blonde will now be opening next weekend. So I took off to the salon to make it life a little better and they were giving away pens THAT WERE ALSO STYLUS! Come to see the show to get the reference!
9/13- Legally Blonde The Musical presented by The Gallery Players, Inc may have been postponed, but that won’t stop me from thinking pink! Everyone needs a pink drink at Starbucks before a hurricane. It’s the cardinal rule of weather!
9/14 – Tonight’s pink is brought to you by the lovely Laura Moog Lanier! As the storm heads our way (maybe) I get to snuggle in my bunny PJ’s! #thinkpink
It is time for me to tell this chapter of my story. It’s only mine to tell. I know there is true concern from others and I am exhausted of fighting the rumor mill; it is time for things to be let into the light.
August 28th I was admitted into the hospital for an unknown infection in my blood stream. The symptoms presented as crippling pain throughout my body, like it was gasping for air but was unable to get any, and a high grade fever.
The doctors were giving me high doses of general antibiotics but nothing was stopping the pain or the fever. After days of this, and the inability to pin point the exact location of the virus, the doctors were truly concerned for how much longer I was going to make it. I was lucky this time. 24 hours after hearing that they came back with a culture that had pinpointed the virus and now we could send a strong and more concentrated antibiotic in to fight the infection. Now the issue came in that the virus had once again latched itself onto my port.
For those who don’t know, I had issues with this in March of last year when a doctor got slice happy and decided to tear my port of 8 years out of my chest. Then some morons decided that it would be a good idea to place the new one right where the old one was despite the fact that the nerve endings had not finished healing. I am afraid I will now always have nerve damage thanks to those morons.
That history made me VERY leery of letting anyone near my port. And they were very understanding. I stood up for myself and what I knew I wanted and what I knew was right for my body. I am now on 9 extra days of I.V. antibiotics as well as a antibiotic that is constantly running through me. I get this “cool” machine that has a tube that hooks to my chest and everything. It has posed an added level of difficulty as I go into tech week of a show, but I will always find a way to make it work.
What no one seems to understand is something like this comes with MAJOR repercussions.
Peoples views will change. I realize I can’t control that. I can live a lie, push too hard, and end up gone faster than I am ready to be, lay in bed and watch my life go by, or I can try to balance the two. I am still learning how do the latter. If you have a manual, please pass it to me because my condition did not come with one.
I wish this story ended some happy way. In a way it does. I will be done with antibiotics soon and then back to life. A little damage to the body, some views slightly skewed, but it’s a ending that I will happily take.